Put it in Perspective

OK, so its almost Thanksgiving. I was going through my emails yesterday and got an email from a Greenville Mother of Multiples member asking for help. Her good friend from church came home from a weekend in the mountains to find their home had burnt to the ground.

Her husband and 4 year old son have lost everything they have...well thats a sobering thought isnt it? As I run around purchasing plastic and rubber toys made in China at $40 a pop for children (mine included) that have so much, her 4 year old has lost not only every toy he had but every baby picture, every keepsake, every stitch of clothing.

Sort of puts things in perspective of what is really important this season...Thanksgiving is in a couple of days and my family is scrambling around trying to make plans and figure out who is having what meal, when. I have been extreamly lucky in the past in that my family is small, Bryan's family and my sister in law's family is fairly small as well, so we have been able to all get together and enjoy the entire day together rather than hoof it on the road to the next feast.

But this year my little sister has another family to consider with her boyfriend, Justin's family, and Leah's little brother, Nate, just got married and his new wife's family has their own plans. Bryan's little brother, Matt, is engaged so his fiance's family requires their holiday time as well. So things are a bit disjointed, just like they are for most other Americans. Remembering the Styles family, though, I am thankful we have such a great family and extended family. Who cares if we cant all be in the same place at the same time. I am just happy that they are there and feel lucky that they are a part of our lives.

I dont have a mean mother in law trying to submarine my relationship with her son...or a family member that is catty and unkind...I might not have the same closeness with everyone, but I genuinely love and enjoy each and every person in our families. According to my friends, that is REALLY something to be thankful for! :-)

So as you are rushing around trying to make your dishes and get to your destinations, and feeling grumpy about it...remember the Styles family, who do not have a kitchen to make Thanksgiving sweet potato cassarole in. Remember my neighbor, Rasheda, who's a single parent and all her family is in London. Remember my grandmother who has spent the last 50 some odd years making Thanksgiving dinner for the same man who is no longer with us. Wow, that really puts it all in perspective, doesn't it? There is always something to be thankful for...I am thankful for you, all the goodness and love in the world (its out there, you just dont hear about it as much as the bad stuff!), and for my ancesters who started the tradition of Thanksgiving so we can take pause in our hectic lives to remember that we really do have many things to be thankful for.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

Oh, Christina What Have You Done???

So I need to fill you in on the latest saga of the Family moving drama…

We have purchased a 1960 brick ranch that is approx. 500 sq ft bigger than our current house but when we are finished with it will be about 1000 sq ft bigger. Its in a neighborhood we really like and in general its a great find. Of course it needs some work...the kitchen is circa 1960 and it has 3 bedrooms and we need 4. The Kitchen is first on the TO DO list and as we move in Dec 15th I want to get as much done to it as possible before we move in. So being proactive I am getting Contrators, Architects, and Interior Designers lined up and formulating a plan before we even close on it on Nov 23rd.

After much ado getting a new kitchen configured my interior designer and Home Depot got a plan that we were all happy with…

ENTER: THE ARCHITECT

I am going to trash her for a minute, but she is really good and knows what the hell she is doing…Lucinda Moore comes in-in the eleventh hour mind you- to draw up the plans for the Contractor. Lucinda looks at what we have come up with and she starts shaking her head and walking around the kitchen and looking at everything. After about 15 minutes of this she announces:

“This is all wrong…if you want to maximize the square footage of your house, have access to your back yard and create a positive flow in this house you need to move the kitchen to where the Dining Room is.”

Well halleluiah and break out the checkbook lets just spend 50K on a kitchen we planned on spending 10K on!! Is what I am thinking…but when I stopped hyperventilating and they got down to brass tacks its really only going to be about 5K more b/c we are tearing out everything in the current kitchen so its just a matter of moving electrical and plumbing and finishing out the walls where the cabinets currently are. BUT its going to add about 4-6 weeks construction time to this whole process that I was trying to get done by 2006!

Can anyone say “Shoot me in the head?” not having a kitchen for approx 2 and a half months with 3 kids under the age of 2 years old!!!!!!!!

So after some tears on my husband's shoulder and running around telling anyone who would listen what I have gotten myself into..I was over at my buddy’s house, Janet, who recommended Lucinda to us by the way, and telling her she is Number 1 on my top ten shit list and her husband pipes in…” Christina, this is the best thing that could have happened…why cant you use the current kitchen while they are constructing the new one and when the new one is ready you cut everything over and then demolish the old kitchen and fix that up…that way you will always have a kitchen through out this whole process!” Brilliant! Mike you get a gold star for the day!

So my emotional roller coaster on this project is back up….will keep you posted on this craziness.

Introduction

So let me bring you up to speed, I am 35 going on 50 when just 3 short years ago I was 32 going on 22. What has caused this dramatic change in attitude, physical appearance and state of mind? They are called Heath (2 years old), Gwyneth and Cooper (8 months old).

Yes, children are the "joy"of your life and yes, I am thankful they are (fairly) healthy. But I will be damned if they haven't brought out the worst traits in my personality. In particular, impatience, temper, and a dictator stance on all things from what color socks they will wear to what they will say to new acquaintances. Wear me out! WHO CARES!?!

See when you are happy go lucky, married to a hot, young buck that is easy going, fun and loved by most...Your good traits are easily cultivated. This was me prior to 32. BUT when you are constantly under the gun, haven't had 8 continuous hours of sleep in 3 years, and trying to be a good mother, good wife, good friend, good employee, good church member, and good person...Well something has to give, lets get real.

I am thoroughly disgusted with myself sometimes...So I ask forgiveness from both the person I have wronged and from God and move on...Because there is little time for much else. But am I learning anything from all of this or am I committing the same 'crimes' and with the subconscious thought that I will ask for forgiveness later? Mmmmm?

So here we go with a blog...It will be interesting to see consistencies as we go along this road.